The blame game

Pointing the finger is so much easier than accepting responsibility. Many of us blame others for things that happen to us instead of recognizing our role in our dissatisfaction. We cannot live life for anyone but ourselves so we cannot blame anyone for making decisions for us. Of course there are times when the actions of others have a negative affect on our lives. Even in those situations we have to remember that the outcome was first a possibility.

Many times we are hurt most by the situations we allow ourselves to be placed in. We are disappointed by the decisions that we make. We are offended by our personal actions which allowed us to be in our current situation. In stating this by no means I am saying that we should constantly internalize and blame ourselves for unfortunate events. Nonetheless we have to know how to assess each situation and place responsibility properly so that we can cope properly.

Learning from the decisions that we make help to mold us into emotionally sound individuals. When we blame others for our decisions we do not learn from our choices. When we accept responsibility for things that are out of our control we do not learn how to handle things appropriately. There is a thin line that is drawn in the sand when it comes to accepting responsibility and accepting blame.

Accepting responsibility for our decisions means that we are aware that we made a choice and we understand how making similar choices can affect us. Taking blame for something means that we are taking responsibility for someone else and their decisions. When we blame ourselves we do not see clearly how to deal with the situation. When we take responsibility we are no longer looking through murky waters attempting to see the other side.

Allowing the negativity of what happens to us to overthrow our positive outlook will cause self-destruction. Doubting that we deserve the best will enable us to accept the worst. Believing that this is as good as it gets will force us to settle for less than we deserve. Trusting the words of others will cloud our judgement and help us to overlook their actions. We have to know that we were placed here to be great and not to be taken for granted. We have to learn from our mistakes and stop taking the blame for what others to do us.

People do what we allow them to do to us. If we do not allow ourselves to be mistreated then we will be highly regarded. If we do not allow ourselves to be abused then we will be adored. If we do not allow ourselves to be walked on we will be lifted up. If we do not allow ourselves to be loved then we will be alone.

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