I have so many ideas running through my mind about what to write, what I want to share, and how to make sure that I get the message across. When I sit down and get ready to write, my mind begins to think about everything else in my life that needs my attention. It is not writer’s block, but more like writer overload.
I have conversations daily that I could turn into blog posts. Inspiration comes from those conversations. Yet and still, when I sit down and begin to write I think about how I am going to boost book sales or what am I going to cover in home school. My daily life seeps into my creative space and distracts my outpour. I want to write and share the gems from my mind constantly. Nevertheless, I am also focused on survival.
It is extremely difficult to be a freelance writer, an author, a poet, a home school teacher, a friend, a mother, a sister, a girlfriend, etc. without getting inundated. The pressure that I put on myself to be great gets heavy. I also feel the pressure to be great for those that depend on me. I also feel the pressure of society to be great.
I share the best of times more than I share the hard times. I show my truth to those that are willing to see it. At the same time, I am also very private. I am tired a lot of times, yet I smile through it all. It is difficult to stay motivated when it feels like you are climbing up a hill that has a downward slope. The way the world influences us does not always help. It is hard and at times it feels like there is no end.
The hardest part of the struggle is moving forward, when you’re in the midst of it, with a positive attitude. I have noticed so many changes recently in my life that have caused me to make adjustments. I was not able to control all of the changes but I moved as they moved me. I am not neglecting the changes that I can make, and I am actively moving on them. I do not run from change, I just like to know what I’m going into. In real life, that is not always an option. As change comes and life shifts, so do priorities and responsibilities.
Things that were important at one time may not be important any longer. Not because there is a lack of interest but because other things have to take precedence. Things that were fun before are not fun enough to sacrifice stability. Choices that were easy to make before are made with more consideration. Things change and adjustments have to be made accordingly. There are times that things change because we change them; there are also times when things change because we did nothing. Regardless, the journey will continue. It is up to us to decide if we want to continue on the journey.