They say that behind/next to/beside every good/great/successful man there is a strong/greater/supportive woman. I began to think about what that meant during a conversation with a friend a while back. This friend told me that they are aware of infidelity in a marriage that appeared to be solid from the outside looking in. The husband is well-respected and the wife is considered to be lucky. I can think about multiple relationships that operate like this and it made my thoughts swirl in a flurry.
The men in these relationships are viewed as good men to everyone that doesn’t know their secret. I am certain the there are men that we look at daily and hold in a light that is different from others because they are upstanding gentleman with charisma, talent, and drive.
So, once again I began to think about the “strong” woman. Is her strength measured in silence? Does she know what is happening? Is her women’s intuition not kicking in or is she ignoring it? There are so many things that went through my mind. Was she chosen for this role because her “strength” was buried under her insecurity? Was she chosen because she would not have a problem being the (weak) woman who he will need her to be so that he can do what he wants to do?
It seems like men choose women that they can control more than they choose women that they can love. The women that they choose are the women that look good on the outside but struggle with everything inside. Essentially, arm candy or image boosters. These women often end up being so much more…The overly violent woman. The accusatory woman. The nagging woman. The stalking woman. The unnecessarily aggressive woman. The snitching woman. The provoking woman. The abusive woman. The manipulating woman. The extremely petty woman.
In my opinion, a strong woman is not a woman who stands by and allows anyone to treat her like she is less than a woman first and foremost. She knows her worth and she accepts nothing less than that. She is often talked about and called names because she does not deal with ignorance, lies, neglect, or emotional bullying.
Men seem like they prefer “strong” (weak) women that they can get away with anything with rather than having a strong woman that will call them on their crap and push them to be better. A strong woman should not be a threat, she should be a prize. Men should change how they view women, how they approach women, how they treat women, and how they interact with women.
If you keep trying to make a “strong”(weak) woman into something that she is not, you will only hurt yourself in the end. You don’t need to change her, you need to change your interactions with her. She has to want to be different. You have to want more for yourself. Surrounding yourself with people who pull out the worst in you will prove to be detrimental to your come up. Live in truth and recognize that appearances only last so long…truth lasts forever.